Jackie, aged 94 and Valerie, aged 93 have known each other for 75 years. They first met at, moving within the same social set. Although they were not close friends at the time, their lives followed strikingly similar paths.
Both were involved in the Jewish Youth Movement, both attended the Girl Guides as teenagers and both married men whose lives were shaped by the Holocaust. Jackie’s husband Hugo, survived Auschwitz, whilst Valerie’s husband Ernest, came to Britain as a refugee from Frankfurt. They also shared a long-standing connection to West London Synagogue, where they would occasionally meet at events and sometimes dinner parties at each other’s homes, over the years.
“Having Jackie at Hammerson House made it far easier for me,” Valerie reflects. “I was concerned about such a big change to my circumstances and way of life. But what attracted me to this home was the warm feeling you encounter the moment you step through the doors. This friendly, inclusive atmosphere is quite remarkable.”
Valerie speaks with admiration about the care and thought behind the building where she now resides, as well as the empathy expressed by the care teams. “When they ask how you are, you really feel they mean it and are genuinely interested.”
Jackie helped Valerie to transition into her new life at Hammerson House and navigate her way through the challenge. Before moving in, her family often reminded her, “Don’t worry you have Jackie there!”
For Jackie, Valerie’s arrival was “simply marvellous.” She soon established an after-supper soirée a daily ritual at 7.30pm each evening in Jackie’s room. They share a glass of sherry and a plateau of fruit, nuts, chocolate and dried mango. On Sunday morning, Jackie’s son accompanies her at 8am to BEKEM’S food store to buy a selection of goodies for the week for both her and her new friend.
Each evening, after supper, Jackie prepares the platter. “We wait for our supper to go down and then have our nosh,” she clarifies. “But we eat sensibly, exercise where possible. We are both conscious of living healthily.”
Valerie continues to lead an active life. She is chairwoman of the monthly lunch club at the synagogue and for the organisation B’nei Brit. This keeps her very busy! With such a full schedule she isn’t always able to take part in all that is on offer at Hammerson House.
“I have so much to do and it’s quite a challenge to juggle all my responsibilities with the wonderful activities available here,” Valerie explains.
However, together Jackie and Valerie still manage to take part in a wide range of activities including French conversation, Art appreciation, music sessions and the popular Desert Island Discs programme organised by Resident Suad.
They also attend psychology group sessions, where different topics are explored. A recent subject was friendship: how bonds are formed and whether it is possible to create close connections later in life, particularly in a care home setting.
“Jackie was busy playing Scrabble, so she missed that session,” Valerie adds with a smile. “But we talked about how meaningful bonds can still develop between people, even without a connection from the past.”
Their friendship is a testament to the possibility of connection in a care home. During their evening soirées they watch television together, discuss the programmes and have political debates, always accompanied by a sherry and a few nibbles. They look forward to spending the evenings together. It is the conviviality that is important to them.
Looking back, they recognise that although they were not close in earlier years, their past has been intertwined through many shared milestones. The trajectory of their lives has led them to this point: living in Hammerson House and enjoying a soiree. Their parallel journeys have brought them together in a new and meaningful way.
At Hammerson House, their story continues.
Amanda Weinberg, Copywriter
